This week's wrap is our final wrap in the Profile of a Champion Mindset series..! Last week we were speaking about commitment and doing the thing you said you were going to do. The last thing we will speak about in this series, with everything we’ve spoken about in mind, is back to goal setting and knowing where we are going. I love the Tony Robbins saying, that controlled focus is like a laser beam. Once we know where we’re going, our whole being automatically starts to direct us towards where we want to be.
Goal setting is one of those funny areas that people struggle with. There are 2 forms of struggle when we are goal setting. The first appears to be that we don't actually set a goal. I would honestly say that in at least 95% of my initial phone conversations with people (male or female) when questioned on their training goals they think that fitness, toning or weight loss are appropriate answers. Often, without knowing you in this phone call, I do not push past this first barrier and think we can overcome it when we get into training.
It is important to understand that these subjective answers come from either thinking it is the right response (the reasons why you're meant to train) or you are trying to put a mirror up - "I have given him an appropriate answer, I don't actually know what I want to get from my training, but somehow he will know and make me feel much better."
The second reason we tend not to set goals, and this links into the first, is simply because we are scared. We are scared of what people will think (is this a stupid thing to work towards or everyone can already do pushups on their toes so I should just keep it to myself), and we are most prominently scared of failure. The idea of falling short or not achieving is what stops the large majority of people from ever starting.
So where do I start..? People love to say, start with your why. The problem with this is our why generally aims to fix something negative. To borrow words from Brene Brown, "Scarcity is the never enough problem. People very quickly fill the blank 'never ___ enough' with their own tapes. Never good enough. Never perfect enough. Never thin enough. Never successful enough. Never smart enough."Focusing on 'lacking' will make your attempt to get to your goal a very negative experience and you are likely to give it up.
Personally, I like to start by answering the question of WHAT? What is it that I actually want to see and go about creating an image in my mind of what it is I am creating with my goals. Once I have got a clear image in my head I will ask 'why'. Knowing that if you connect to your 'why', there is no excuse that will get in the way of you achieving it.
To quote Melinda Gates in her new book 'The Moment of Lift' (which I have just started reading and strongly suggest everyone who is interested in improving our society to have a read of) - "Wisdom isn’t about accumulating more facts; it’s about understanding big truths in a deeper way." So I'm going to give you a new model that you can use as you are setting your direction and creating the image of what you want to see. It is called the GROW model.
Goal - What is it that you want to see?
Reality - What is happening in the world around you?
Options - What could you do? What are all the options you have?
Will - What will you do? From all the options available, what actions will generate the best outcome?
As we come into the new training season and I start to pose questions about your goals or what you want to achieve at training, take some time to think before you answer. Refer back to anything we have spoken about here. Apply your GROW model and then action, action, action!