In last weeks wrap, I spoke about how our limiting beliefs have generally come from well-intentioned people in our lives, and this has shaped our self-image in the present day. Today I want to talk about how we might improve the self-image. Often you hear people talk about self-image and talk about self-image and you never get to dissect it so that you can see, how you actually improve a self-image.
First of all, if our self-image is based on a belief system, and the belief systems are based upon the patterns of my mind - my definitions and interpretations of the events. I develop those by ascribing themes to the stimuli that come into me. I make things mean something. All the things that happen to me, I have self-talk about those and I make them mean something. I acquired some beliefs and you acquired some beliefs about yourself out of the patterns of your thinking, and these became habitual.
All our decisions in life are decisions based off emotion. It is our emotions that drive encourage us to take action. The lack of action is not an issue of self control, information or discipline, it is an emotional response from our feeling brain. It is our feeling brain that decides on which stories we choose to play on repeat in our head and which ones dictate how we see the world. It is then up to our Thinking brain or Logical brain to convince us on why all these stories are in fact true.
From here what we get into is called 'resisting who I am'. When I understand that I need to do something about my self-image, the first thing that people tend to do is go; ‘well I need to change’.
How many people have made promises that they are going to change, to find that they are actually worse off a month later than when they started? It is true for all of us and the reason is, ‘that which you resist about yourself, persists about yourself’.
You're paying so much attention to it, gives it in a sense beingness and reaffirms the stories about yourself playing on repeat in your mind. What you need to do is not focus on what’s wrong with yourself, rather shift your focus onto what you want to be. Really there are 2 ways of dealing with these feelings towards yourself. Either rewrite your emotions towards the events in the past that have lead to your current image of yourself or change the way you are going to respond to these feelings about yourself in future events.
In all honesty, it is a combination of both. There is an element of changing how you hold past events, to not effect your present perception of self. But also don't be afraid to get a vision of where you’re heading and stay focused on where you’re heading. You’ll be amazed, you'll start to get engaged in new activities.
Now we’re looking at the real substance of changing your self-image. Ultimately, you must be willing to get out of your comfort zone. Which incidentally if you really knew what a comfort zone was, you’d be only too eager to jump out. It’s so inconsistent with your capabilities as a human being. It’s a tremendous illusion that people are living with and they don’t really understand that they are slowly killing themselves. They don’t see that their true nature is to achieve, to stretch, to excel, to reach.